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(Campaign 2 - Episode 7)
Release Date: March 7, 2022
Recording Date: March 1, 2022
Episode Length: 59:57
Cast & Characters
Michael DiMauro: Dungeon Master
Tim Lanning: T'chuck
Jennifer Cheek: Selene von Esper
Nika Howard: R'oarc
Mike Bachmann: Screech Echo
Previous Episode: Next Episode:
Checking In (2x06) Heretic (2x08)

There are several issues that call our heroes, but they must be vigilant for useless distractions. Especially the ones that hurt super bad.


Long Story[]

The party has been split. R'Oarc and Screech make their way through the dense, dark, and treacherous forest, to find the neighboring Grizzly-folk. They want to see what the bears might know of the mysterious goings on of late. Along the way, the two discuss their life situations: Screech being richer than dirt, and R'Oarc needing to occasionally eat dirt, during failed harvests and whatnot. It's a little awkward, but fortunately, a giant ogre shows up! Well, maybe that's not so fortunate, but it does stop their conversation. Screech runs away, and shortly afterward, a man in a koala suit appears! He is, however, not strong enough to defeat the ogre, which bests the two of them. They are knocked unconscious, but before they pass out fully, Screec-- I MEAN, KOALA MAN! sees a figure stepping toward them from the darkness...

Meanwhile, back in Rimeford, T'Chuck and Selene have teamed up to (finally) speak with Granona Flintbeard. Along the way, the stop at The Goblin Pit, so T'Chuck can sell Selene some fish and chips. Gotta make that money somehow. Anyway, they get to Flintbeard, and discuss various things: R'Oarc's beat poetry, Screech Echo and his piece-of-shit-ness, the mysterious rodent-dressed figure running around that T'Chuck trusts implicitely, and the Knockers invading the mines, being general nuisances. On that last point, it's decided that T'Chuck, Selene, and co. will come back tomorrow to deal with the Knockers. Flintbeard doesn't want to interfere with the workers, or put them in danger, so she'll have everyone take a half day tomorrow while our heroes take care of business. Also, T'Chuck wants R'Oarc to be there, too. Screech is, as mentioned, an unhelpful piece-of-shit, so he'll probably tag along and make things worse. Oh well, what can you do.

Following their meeting, T'Chuck and Selene wait around for a while for the others to get back. They have a nice picnic out by a local chicken farm. It's lovely, there's a waterfall by the ridge. There's a giant water wheel attached to the elevator, which used to bring Theonite out from the mines. It's quite nice. Anyway, T'Chuck has to work, so they wait at The Goblin Pit. While they're waiting, T'Chuck opens up to Selene. He reveals that he fought in the Mage Wars, but neglects to specify which side he fought for. He does have a lot baggage from it. Talk turns to Alondra Thorne, Selene asking if she can be trusted...' T'Chuck doesn't think her intentions are bad, per se, but notes that she doesn't seem to be very competent.

Around this time, R'Oarc is meant to be performing her poetry, and it's becoming clear that something is wrong. T'Chuck, getting nervous, asks Ratma Ritmo if she's seen R'Oarc. She hasn't, but she has found several scraps of fur in the garbage, remnants of the Squirrel Man's old costume. She doesn't recognize it, however, opting to turn it into a shawl. And, she threatens to dock R'Oarc's pay if she doesn't show, so... real charmer, that Ritmo.

What to do now? Has anyone else seen R'Oarc? Yes! Everyone's favorite bartend, Meat! He pipes in, reporting that he saw R'Oarc and Screech head off toward the Grizzly-folk this morning. Welp, I guess we now have a mission to go on. T'Chuck asks for Selene and (for some reason) Ritmo's help. Selene agrees. Ritmo does not.

Before they depart, however, Selene's collar heats up, warning her that she has a call incoming from Master Caegin. Off she runs to her hidden copse of trees to communicate with him. Caegin's pissed! He's found out that The Farhold Trumpeter is in Rimeford, and that the next day's paper contains a scandalous story about a man in a squirrel costume running around. This will not stand. He tells Selene that he's sending additional Adepts to Rimeford, and that if Devin Decacog is not dead before the Adepts arrive, Selene will be in trouble. But, he warns, she needs to make it look like an accident.

Selene agrees...


R'Oarc and Screech go out looking for the Bear-folk, but are attacked by an ogre! They're knocked unconscious, but are rescued by a mysterious figure. Meanwhile, T'Chuck and Selene meet up with Granona Flintbeard. They will come back tomorrow to deal with the Knocker infestation, when the mining crew is gone, and the rest of the adventuring party is not gone. After waiting for a while, T'Chuck and Selene learn which direction the others went in, and decide to go follow them. But first, Selene is instructed by Master Caegin that Devin Decacog must be killed, and he's sending additional Adepts to Rimeford to make sure Selene does the job.


  • One winter, in Rimeford, all of the crops died, so they had to eat dirt.
  • Screech's new fursona alter-ego is Koala Man!
  • Tim T'Chuck decides that Rimeford has a hot springs. We already know it has a waterfall, so why not?
  • It's fall time.
  • T'Chuck does not have a Dark Past...
  • 37 Farhold clicks = 1 minute. That is canon.
  • R'Oarc's father was killed in the Mage Wars.

In This Episode...[]

Cast and Player Characters[]

Non-Player Characters[]



T'chuck Selene von Esper R'oarc Screech Echo General Inventory
5 gp, 17 sp + some money from Selene
Hunting Knife
Bear Pelt[2x02]
A stick[2x04]
R'oarc's Quill[2x04]
Mining Hammer[2x05]
Mining Helmet[2x05]
Heavy Armor[2x06]
Theonite Collar
Various Books
Bear Skull[2x02]
Torture Knife[2x05]
30,000 Dollars (not gold pieces)
Meat Flask
+1 Battle Claws[2x05]

Quest Log Updates[]


  • "I say something to the tune of... 'Eucalyptus better get out of here...' {the others groan} 'Euca---' This is all Screech, too, by the way, this isn't Bachmann trying to figure it out, this is all Screech." ~ Mike Bachmann
  • "It wouldn't be a Tuesday, if it didn't have R'Oarc doin' her beat poetry!" ~ Granona Flintbeard
  • "Michael, can we agree that there is 12 months. Every month: same number of days. It's fucked up that February exists." ~ Tim Lanning


Combat Begins vs Ogre

  • Initiative
    • Screech - 22
    • Ogre
    • R'Oarc - 9

Round One

  • Screech
    • Uses bonus action to hide (using Stealth) - 19
      • Success - He is hidden
    • Dons his "armor", by doffing his "clothes"
    • Melee Attack vs Ogre {x2} - 19, 22
      • Hit, Hit - 14 + 6 damage

  • Ogre
    • Melee Attack (Club) vs Screech - 22
      • Hit - 13 bludgeoning damage - Downs him

  • R'Oarc
    • Casts Sleep on the Ogre - 18
      • It has more than 18 HP, so it is not put to sleep

Round Two

  • Screech
    • Rolls a Death Saving Throw - <10
      • One step closer to dying

  • Ogre
    • Melee Attack (Club) vs R'Oarc - 21
      • Hit - 13 bludgeoning damage

  • R'Oarc
    • Melee Attack (Rapier) vs Ogre - 7
      • Miss
    • Runs far away, provoking an opportunity attack from the Ogre - Nat20
      • Hit - 23 damage - Downs her

Combat Ends

  • T'Chuck rolls Insight when being Selene is talking about Alondra - 8
    • He is not suspicious of her

  • T'Chuck rolls Perception or Persuasion to use his bartending powers to find out where R'Oarc is - 17 or 19
    • Meat sees which way R'Oarc went