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Despite All My Rage I Am Still Just A Spider In A Cage
(Campaign 2 - Episode 79)
Dnd cover c2-79

Chibi-style T'Chuck

Information
Release Date: December 4, 2023
Recording Date: November 28, 2023
Episode Length: 1:13:27
Cast & Characters
Michael DiMauro: Dungeon Master
Tim Lanning: T'Chuck
Jennifer Cheek: Selene von Esper
Nika Howard: R'Oarc
Mike Bachmann: Screech Echo
Guide
Previous Episode: Next Episode:
Total Blackout Doug's Ex


The initial ambush has been thwarted but our heroes now have to deal with those two giant spiders outside. Can R’Oarc’s illusion hold them at bay!? Tune in to find out!

Story[]

Long Story[]

The party has just come out victorious from their fight against some evil Drow that had attacked them. They have also just come out victorious from leveling up. They are now level 8! Cool!

But there's no time to rest. From the sounds of screaming that can be heard outside, there are still the two giant spiders that were attacking. Running outside, the party sees that those spiders are still trapped in an illusory cage, but will nevertheless need to be dealt with. R'Oarc takes this opportunity to jump upon the back of one of these spiders, but is rewarded with a spider bite. This sparks a fight between the spiders and the party. Seems easy enough. Except for one little thing. Or, rather, three little things. Or, rather, three medium sized things. That is to say, three more Drow appear and attack the party, too! There's a priestess of Lolth, a mage, and a warrior, who all work together to cause problems for our intrepid heroes.

R'Oarc spends the fight doing her support thing, granting HP and inspiration to her friends. T'Chuck distracts the spiders by being, just, so juicy and thicc. He is able to send his Spiritual Guardians to chip away at the foes, eventually taking out one of the giant spiders. He uses a well-timed Toll the Dead to finish off the mage. The other spider is killed by Screech. Meanwhile, Selene absolutely wrecks shop, blasting these foes with Fire Bolts and Lightening, very very frightening, me. She's also able to use a Counterspell to prevent the priestess from summoning slithering tentacles, which is good. Because that would also be very scary. Ultimately, she fries the Drow Warrior with Lightning Bolt, who crisps to the ground in an ashy pile. All that's left is a single bone, which she takes for herself.

The priestess hisses at T'Chuck, asking where Ratma is. She's not here, so the priestess threatens that when she returns, she'll find all of their dead bodies. Unfortunately for her, she's knocked unconscious by Screech. That's embarrassing. T'Chuck ties her up, for questioning...

Short[]

The party levels up! They are now Level 8! They then get into a fight with two giant spiders, and three scary Drow. One of them, a sexy priestess of Lolth, is knocked out by Screech. They tie her up for questioning, and the episode ends.

Trivia[]

  • For their Level 8 stuff, T'Chuck tool warcaster. R'Oarc took a Charisma score improvement. Screech took Blindfighting. Selene took an ability score improvement. Selene has 50 HP, which is one fewer HP than T'Chuck does. So, he has 51 HP. R'Oarc has 67 HP, and her AC is 13. Selene's AC is 15.
  • This seems to be unrelated to the spider that Grimmshaw Shadowhoof had in his enclosure. That was a potential mount.
    • This reminds Bachmann of Jerry.

In This Episode...[]

Cast and Player Characters[]

Non-Player Characters[]

  • Priestess of Lolth
  • Unnamed Drow Mage and Drow Warrior

Locations[]

Inventory[]

T'Chuck Selene von Esper R'Oarc Screech Echo General Inventory
648 gold
Hunting Knife
Heavy Armor[2x06]
+1 Mace of Regnier[2x31]
Diamond worth 300 gp[2x34]
Breast-plate armor[2x34]
Backpack full of various useful things, such as "a tent or two", jerky, bread, cheese, etc.[2x38]
36 Boner Pills[2x61]
5 dead Phase Spiders[2x63]
A pair of disembodied lips, cured for preservation[2x65]
5 Kruthik heads[2x71]
A bunch of children's gummy vitamins[2x76]
Theonite Collar
Various Books
Devin Decacog's ring from The Farhold Trumpeter[2x14]
Bag of 50 gp[2x22]
7 Boner Pills[2x66]
[NEW] Bone of dead Drow Warrior
Torture Knife[2x05]
D20-sized rock of Theonite[2x16]
Theonite Sending Stone[2x17]
Theonite Ring of Protection[2x19]
5 Potions of Greater Healing[2x23]
Homemade "Resuscitation Kit"[2x38]
Crudely copied map of the tunnels around Mineford[2x55]
Handful of different mushrooms from the tunnel walls[2x55]
Penny candies from the Mineford General Store[2x55]
A ton of Screech Bucks, as carnival currency[2x62]
Several Hand-drawn Screech Bucks[2x63]
Single Hand-drawn R'Oarc Buck, worth 100 dollars[2x63]
7 Boner Pills[2x66]
A bunch of moss[2x76]
5 VIP tickets to "Owlbearpalooza" in Farhold[2x77]
The disembodied skeletal hand of either Stephanie or Wally Bonebraids[2x78]
+1 Battle Claws[2x05]
Grappling Hook[2x01?]
Torch[2x16]
Darkvision Goggles[2x59]
Drider's Scimitar[2x66]
7 Boner Pills[2x66]
"Please and Thank You" Amulet from Grimmly Tumbletoes[2x69]
Gem worth 5 gold[2x71]
4 Potions of Superior Healing[2x75]
1 Potion of Vitality[2x75]
1 Potion of Maximum Power[2x75]
Map of the tunnels around Mineford[2x55]
Crystal that shows some glowing mushrooms[2x55]
200 gp worth of an unknown "silky smooth, highly valuable substance" from the Brain Collector[2x57]
Drider's Longbow[2x58]
Drider's Chain Mail[2x58]
Drider's Leg Meat[2x58]
Map to Grimshaw Shadowhoof's maze[2x67]

Quest Board[]

  • [NEW][Active] - Question the Priestess of Lolth
  • [Active] - Find a cure for Thaldin Emberbrew
    • [On-Hold] - Go to the nearby Drow city
  • [On-Hold] - Save Selene's family!
  • [On-Hold] - Investigate the mysterious goings-on to the east
  • [On-hold] - Investigate "Bill, the Necromancer", in the far off city by the coast
  • [On-hold] - Take the disembodied lips to the oceanfront, for a burial at sea

Quotes[]

  • "To know the mind of a horse, you have to be wise." ~ Jennifer Cheek
  • "I get real suck-able. And that's my turn." ~ Tim Lanning

Rolls[]

  • Giant Spider 2 bites R'Oarc - 13
    • Hit - 7 Piercing damage, also requires her to make a Constitution Saving Throw - Nat 20
      • Success - 4 Poison damage

Combat Begins vs 2 Giant Spiders


  • Initiative
    • R'Oarc - 22
    • Giant Spider 1
    • Screech - 20
    • Selene - 17
    • Giant Spider 2
    • T'Chuck - 11

Round One


  • R'Oarc
    • Casts Viscous Mockery - 3
      • Fail
    • Also, rolls Perception - 13
      • I'm not 100% sure why

  • Giant Spider 1
    • Melee Attack vs T'Chuck - 19
      • Hit - 7 Piercing, also requires him to make a Constitution Saving Throw - 1
        • Fail - 9 Poison damage

  • Screech
    • Rolls Perception - 13
      • I'm still not 100% sure why
    • Melee Attack vs Giant Spider 2 {x3} - 17, 18, 19
      • Hit, Hit, Hit - 21 damage

  • Drow Priestess
    • Enters the fray, I think this is what the Perception rolls were about
    • She attempts to summon a Yochlol - ??
      • Fails, it attacks her and disappears - 5 damage

  • Selene
    • Rolls Perception to see if there are maybe other people here - 15
      • There are, in fact, maybe other people here. Two other Drow enter the fight, one with a sword, and one with a staff
    • Casts Fire Ball (Quickened) on the Priestess and the Staff Drow, requiring Dexterity Saving Throws
      • Drow Priestess - 12
        • Fail - 32 Fire damage
      • Staff Drow - 9
        • Fail - 32 Fire damage
    • Casts Firebolt on the Sword Drow - 15
      • Miss
    • Uses a Bonus Action to Telekinetic Shove the Sword Drow, requiring a Strength Saving Throw - 17
      • Success - Not shoved

  • Staff Drow
    • Casts a spell, creating a bunch of "squirmy, ebony tentacles"
      • Selene casts Counterspell to stop him - 15
        • The Counterspell is successful, the tentacles are stopped

  • Sword Drow
    • Melee Attack (Shortsword) vs Selene {x2} - 16, 15
      • Hit, Hit - 14 Piercing + 20 Poison damage

  • Giant Spider 1
    • Melee Attack (Bite) vs R'Oarc - 10
      • Miss

  • T'Chuck
    • Casts Sprit Guardians to create spirit guardians, requiring Wisdom Saving Throws from anyone within 15 ft
      • Giant Spider 1 - 7
        • Fail - 16 Radiant damage
      • Giant Spider 2 - 9
        • Fail - 16 Radiant damage - Kills it
      • Sword Drow - 14
        • Fail - 16 Radiant damage
    • Grants 4 temporary HP to Screech and himself

Round Two


  • R'Oarc
    • Casts Cure Wounds on Selene
    • Grants Bardic Inspiration to Selene

  • Screech
    • Melee Attack vs Giant Spider 1 (with Advantage) - 12 24, 17
      • Hit, Hit - 17 damage - Kills it

  • Drow Priestess
    • Casts some spell, which makes the bad guys seem a little healthier

  • Selene
    • Cast Shocking Grasp (Quickened) vs Sword Drow - 22
      • Hit - 10 Lightning damage
    • Uses a Bonus Action to Telekinetic Shove the Sword Drow, requiring a Strength Saving Throw - 8
      • Fail - He is shoved 5 ft back
    • Casts Lightning Bolt (4th Level) on 2 enemies, requiring Dexterity Saving Throws
      • Drow Priestess - 18
        • Success - 32 16 Lightning damage
      • Staff Drow - 20
        • Success - 32 16 Lightning damage

  • Staff Drow
    • Casts Lightning Bolt on T'Chuck and Selene, requiring Dexterity Saving Throws
      • T'Chuck - 8
        • Fail - 30 Lightning damage
      • Selene - Nat 20
        • Success - 30 15 Lightning damage

  • Sword Drow
    • Melee Attack vs Screech (x2) - 14, 25
      • Hit, Hit - 14 Piercing + 20 Poison damage

  • T'Chuck
    • Spirit Guardians start near the Sword Drow, requiring a Wisdom Saving Throw - 10
      • Fail - 21 Radiant damage
    • Casts Toll the Dead on the Staff Drow, requiring a Wisdom Saving Throw - 12
      • Fail - 9 Necrotic damage - Kills him!
    • Approaches the Drow Priestess, which means the Spirit Guardians enter her zone, requiring a Wisdom Saving Throw - 8
      • Fail - 19 Radiant damage

Round Three


  • R'Oarc
    • Casts Cure Wounds on T'Chuck, healing him for - 13 HP
    • Grants Bardic Inspiration to T'Chuck

  • Screech
    • Melee Attack (Non-lethal) vs Drow Priestess - Nat 20
      • Hit - 22 damage - Knocks her out
    • Ranged Attack (Little knife) vs Sword Drow - 13
      • Miss

  • Selene
    • Casts Fire Ball on Sword Drow, requiring a Dexterity Saving Throw - 9
      • Fail - 36 Fire damage - Kills him!

Combat Ends


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