| Cemetery Plots (Campaign 2 - Episode 114) |
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| Information | |
| Release Date: | October 8, 2024 |
| Recording Date: | October 4, 2024 |
| Episode Length: | 1:09:11 |
| Cast & Characters | |
| Michael DiMauro: | Dungeon Master |
| Tim Lanning: | T'Chuck |
| Jennifer Cheek: | Selene von Esper |
| Nika Howard: | R'Oarc |
| Mike Bachmann: | Screech Echo |
| Guide | |
| Previous Episode: | Next Episode: |
| Frog Factions | Do Not Say His Name |
Our heroes regroup and plan to head out for the cemetery. Will they find they find the leader of the Dartblades or another unknown adversary…But first…what to do about their circus companions…
Story[]
Long Story[]
Here's the situation: In two days, a meeting is supposed to take place between three frog-like assassin creatures, and thier assassin guild contact, "The Professor". These assassins were supposed to have killed The Emperor, but were stopped by our intrepid heroes. Now, said heroes are planning to take the place of these assassins, and meet with the contact themselves. The meeting is to take place in the grand graveyard, outside of Farhold. The party does have the means to make it there in time. The circus they are traveling with, however, does not. They will reach Farhold in about a week and a half. So, the party will have to go it alone.
But what about their various wards and charges? They decide to leave J'Michael behind, not wanting to attract any further attention. Big Bo, aka The Emperor, will need to come with them. He's currently disguised as a Juggalo, so that should be okay. Screech also summons his ward/partner Dick Goodie, by doing his special Dick WhistleTM. They charge him with watching over J'Michael, to keep him out of trouble. No easy feat, as evident by the fact that J'Michael has recently eaten all the cotton candy at the circus! Well, it's not the worst thing he's eaten at the circus, I can tell you that.
This conversation all seems to be happening in the Golden Grain Tavern, right above Lucius Vale's shop, but then, Barnabas Rumbletoes shows up. And they might be back at the circus at this point? It's unclear. Anyway, they tell Barnabas that they'll be going away for a couple days, to "make sure the road ahead is clear". He gives them a stack of fliers for the circus, so they can put them up on their way. He also tells them that Fizzlebang Glimmerstone has been murdered! R'Oarc, who has exactly zero chill, proclaims that that was her husband! When Barnabas points out that the city guards are looking for a mysterious woman who was seen with him, she backs off. "I've never met that man in my life!" she says, lyingly. Finally, Barnabas tells them that the circus is going to be packing up tonight, to head out for Farhold. They should be there in about a week and a half.
In order to traverse the landscape, the party considers mounting their spooky steeds: The spider mounts they got from their time underground. But, those would only attract unwanted attention, so they elect to borrow some horses from the circus. They don't bother naming these horses, however, since fuck horses.
Out they ride! It's an uneventful trek, as they pass a few small villages along the way. Night approaches, and they decide to stop at an inn at the side of the road. Big mistake. Huge. It's called "The Crumble Inn", not only because of the state of the place, but also because crumbs, and crumb-like foods, are all they seem to serve here. Well, that and rumors. The bartender tells them that the name of the grand graveyard outside of Farhold is called "Grimwatch Hollow", but warns them to stay away. Not only is it haunted by the undead, but there's also supposed to be an assassin's guild operating out of the graveyard. Welp. Despite the tavern's lunacy, the party decides to stay here anyway. Turns out it was actually a good thing, because their room (with a single bed) is somehow really nice, actually.
The next morning, as they leave, T'Chuck hands some fliers to the barkeep. And off they go once again. After stopping for a nice lunch (and to take pictures on The Largest Toilet in the Farhold Suburbs), the party finally makes it to their destination. It's around dusk at this point, but they can still see the large gate signaling entry into the walled graveyard. It's spooky af. Off in the distance, they can make out the city of Farhold. After all this time, it feels pretty surreal to actually be seeing it. Well, hearing of seeing it. Obviously, it's an audio medium. But you get the idea.
There's a lot of talk about Farhold, and who's from there. Selene and Screech are. Actually, Episode 1 had some scenes here. Screech wonders if Milton Graves is around. He is, but there's no way to get word to him right now. Also, one of the frog assassins (Zits, I believe) had given them a map of the graveyard's path. If they were to stray from it, they'd surely be eaten by undead. That doesn't sounds too bad to R'Oarc, who pokes one toe off the path. Just the tip, just to see how it feels. Suddenly, a bunch of sinister looking eyes peer out from the shadows. She pokes her toe back in. Doesn't feel too good, it turns out. Also, Big Bo is still there, but they decide his Juggalo costume is a little too conspicious. They change it to... something else. It keeps getting forgotten about, so they just decide to say "he looks different," and leave it at that. He's still hot, though. Obviously.
They make like Dorothy, and stick to the path. It winds and weaves. The deeper they get into the graveyard, the darker and creepier it gets. We should rename Michael to James Whale, because it's like the opening scene in Frankenstein, when they're stealing bodies from that graveyard. Anyway, yeah, it's misty, there's bats fluttering around. It's hella creepy. To aid them in their travels, R'Oarc casts Animate Dead to summon three skeletons to their side. I guess they're supposed to be guides, but they already know where to go? Unclear.
Eventually, they come upon a tall, creepy house at the top of an eerie hill. The front door is ajar, so Screech stealths his way up and peers inside. He sees a big empty room, with naught inside but a beam of moonlight, and a large mirror. Screech slithers inside, peers into the mirror, and is shocked to see a figure pacing back and forth in the mirror. It appears to be an Aarakocra, wearing dark leathers, with a bejeweled dagger at his side. Screech is smart enough to know not to jump into the mirror that's obviously a portal to some kind of alternate mirror dimension. So instead, he just reaches out a finger, and touches it. Just the tip, just to see how it feels. And he gets sucked in. You know what, it happens to all of us at some point, doesn't it.
Screech goes falling, tumbling all around in a sea of reflections. He doesn't know which way is which, until he lands softly on a comfortable sofa. He's in a different room, and there's no Aarakocra to be seen. Instead, he sees a diorama of what appears to be a graveyard. The same graveyard he was just in. Screech peers out the window, and based on the angle, it seems he's high up, in the attic or something. Checking out the diorama reveals a few little characters, but it doesn't sound like Screech recognizes any of them.
Meanwhile, the others are waiting for Screech outside. They continue waiting, and then they wait some more. An indeterminate amount of time passes before they decide to go in after him. They see a big empty room, with naught inside but a beam of moonlight, and a large mirror. They slither inside, peer into the mirror, and are shocked to see a figure pacing back and forth in the mirror. It appears to be an Aarakocra, wearing dark leathers, with a bejeweled dagger at his side. They are smart enough to know not to jump into the mirror that's obviously a portal to some kind of alternate mirror dimension. So instead, Selene casts Seeming on herself, T'Chuck, and R'Oarc, to make themselves appear to be the three frog assassins from before, Zits, Pimple, and Rash. Big Bo is made to look like a new fourth frog, a big bullfrog looking guy. And the skeletons look like frog skeletons. Cool. R'Oarc reaches out and taps on the glass, which suddenly shatters! Shards go flying everywhere, and then, everyone gets sucked into the mirror realm! "Whoaaaaaa!", they say as they fall, I assume.
Everyone collapses into a pile on the couch. Screech is standing by the diorama playing with the dolls figurines on it. They greet each other, then R'Oarc notices a book, with a very interesting title. It's called "The Handbook for the Recently Deceased". So, Michael's not James Whale, he's actually Tim Burton. Got it. Oh, hey. And Bachmann is playing a Batman type character, which was also directed by Burton. And also starred Michael Keaton. That's funny. Yeah, people don't talk about how Batman was Burton and Keaton's second collaboration. Interesting stuff.
R'Oarc flips through the book. Seems to be mostly nonsense. Page 39 reads "Sign with a smile, but read with a frown.", and page 42 reads "No form is complete without a final question, even if the answer is "Unknown"." No idea what any of that means. There is, however, a door on one of the walls. Screech goes to open it, and finds it isn't locked. On the other side is a hallway, and standing in that hallway are... well, it's hard to describe. There are two figures, that resemble humanoid shapes, but they're made of silvery glass. Instead of faces, they have smooth, reflective faces, and their armor is intricately etched with delicate patterns. They wield longswords that appear to be carved out of solidified light. And they seem to be attacking!
Short[]
The party leaves the circus and heads for the graveyard outside of Farhold. After staying the night at The Crumble Inn, they eventually make it to the graveyard, where R'Oarc summons three skeleton guides. They are almost immediately forgotten about lol. At the center of the graveyard is a tall house, and when they enter it, they see an empty room with a mirror. Inside, an Aarakocra is pacing back and fourth. When they touch the mirror, they are sucked into a mirror dimension! Now, they seem to be in the attic of the house, with a diorama of the graveyard. There's also a book titled "The Handbook for the Recently Deceased", which seems to be full of riddles. And there's a door, on the other side of which are two glass creatures which attack them!
Trivia[]
- There's a reference to T'Chuck's job at the circus being to just sit around and smoke cigarettes. From the sounds of it, this is known information that they seem to have talked about repeatedly. But it seems to be news to Jennifer. And also to me. I don't remember anything about that.
- We all, of course remember the names of everyone's spider mounts, right? R'Oarc's is named Greeg, Selene's is named Stella, and Screech's is Buggy. T'Chuck's donkey is named Lilly, although he constantly forgets, and thinks it's actually Rose.
- Rose also smokes cigarettes.
- Bachmann had a donkey, and some horses growing up.
- Tim and Jennifer's cats, named Lucy and Laser, were originally named Lilly and Lilac, but they don't remember which was which.
- The spider mounts are now part of the circus act.
- R'Oarc and Nika both hate riddles.
- Page 42 of the Handbook reads "No form is complete without a final question, even if the answer is "Unknown"." This is a reference to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. In that series, the ultimate answer to life, the universe, and everything is revealed to be 42, but since no one knows what the actual question is, the answer is worthless. Hence the Handbook's reference to an unknown "final question" that has a known answer.
In This Episode...[]
Cast and Player Characters[]
- Michael DiMauro - Dungeon Master
- Tim Lanning - T'Chuck
- Jennifer Cheek - Selene von Esper
- Nika Howard - R'Oarc
- Mike Bachmann - Screech Echo
Non-Player Characters[]
- Dick Goodie
- Big Bo
- Barnabas Rumbletoes
- The Crumble Inn's bartender
- Three Skeleton companions
Locations[]
- Drunkeros
- Brookwillow
- The Golden Grain Tavern
- The Big Top Traveling Circus and Magnificent Menagerie
- The Crumble Inn
- Farhold
- Grimwatch Hollow
- Brookwillow
Inventory[]
| T'Chuck | Selene von Esper | R'Oarc | Screech Echo | General Inventory | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Quest Board[]
- [Active] - Keep The Emperor safe
- [Active] - Find out who ordered the hit on the Emperor
- [Active] - Meet "The Professor" in Grimwatch Hollow, a graveyard outside of Farhold
- [Active] - Find out who ordered the hit on the Emperor
- [On-Hold] - Save Selene's family!
- [Abandoned?] - Go to Brunnell
- [On-Hold] - Wait for Ratma Ritmo to arrive in Brookwillow
- [On-Hold] - Recruit the help of Hortentia Calamore
- [On-Hold] - Travel to Vhur'endal
- [On-Hold] - Recruit the help of House Bartell
- [On-Hold] - Travel to Anchordowns
- [Abandoned?] - Go to Brunnell
- [On-Hold] - Find a cure for Thaldin Emberbrew
- [On-Hold] - Go to the nearby Drow city, probably Vhur'endal
- [On-hold] - Investigate "Bill, the Necromancer", in the far off city by the coast
- [On-hold] - Take the disembodied lips to the oceanfront, for a burial at sea
Quotes[]
- "Should we kill J'Michael? He's a lot of work..." ~ T'Chuck/Tim Lanning
- "Dick Goodie. I haven't seen him in a bit. And, like, you know, maybe that reflects poorly on me, but I think it's personal growth, 'cause I remembered his name." ~ Mike Bachmann
- "I'm not gonna fucking name this horse." ~ Jennifer Cheek
- "It's almost like some unseen force is trying to move our lives along..." ~ Mike Bachmann
- "If I saw a juggalo in a graveyard, I'd kill myself." ~ Tim Lanning
Rolls[]
- T'Chuck rolls Insight to see if the crumby bartender is lying to them - 17
- He's not lying to them.
- T'Chuck and Selene roll Perception to see if they can spot Screech's dead body anywhere
- T'Chuck - 27
- Selene - 24
- They don't see his dead body, but there is an Aarokokra in the mirror.
- Everyone rolls Perception upon entering the mirror dimension
- T'Chuck - 19
- R'Oarc - Nat 20 + 7
- Screech - 16
- Selene - just says she "rolls bad"
- R'Oarc notices a book titled "The Handbook for the Recently Deceased"
- R'Oarc rolls a d100 upon reading the Handbook for the Recently Deceased - 39
- She opens to Page 39. It says "Sign with a smile, but read with a frown."